Today I was talking to my daughter about setting goals. She has been having a little bit of difficulty with her school work, and she seems to be very unmotivated to change it. I talked to her about setting short-term and long-term goals, but most of the time I felt like I was talking to a brick wall. It made me feel that this generation of kids today just can't seem to connect the dots.
I remember growing up and just knowing that if I wanted something I had to work for it. My brothers and sisters will probably argue that I got everything I wanted because I was the baby of the family. I would disagree. We were not a wealthy family by any means. In fact, we were just the opposite. My parents had eleven children for goodness sakes! That's probably why we were so poor! I don't think we were poverty level, but then again I was kind of oblivious to our financial situation (as most kids are). I remember the whole family volunteering for food share programs. That's how we got some of our groceries. But then again there were times we seemed to have nice things. I mean we had a VCR, an Atari and a Nintendo. Remember the first of those home entertainment items? We even went to a private Catholic school. That wasn't cheap. Anyway, I knew that I wouldn't just have things handed to me. I did go to a university after high school and paid for it myself (still paying for it).
My daughter does have a long-term goal. She wants to be on Broadway. I think it's a terrific goal. She is a very talented dancer. She wants to go to Juiliard. Again, another great goal. But when I ask her how she is going to make that happen, she gets a blank look on her face. It's almost as if she is saying, "Aren't you going to help me with that?" Do kids these days understand THEY have to do something to make it happen? What happened between our generation and this generation?(I'm sure our parents say the same thing about us.)
I asked her if she knew what it takes to get into Juiliard. She didn't know. Imagine that! Being in the technology generation, she hasn't looked it up. I've looked it up and I knew it's not based purely on skill or talent. They do take studies into consideration. And you have to get recommendation letters by school teachers and dance teachers. I think she just thought it would happen...eventually...somehow...miraculously. Or she'd deal with it when the time came to apply. She's in seventh grade now and I keep trying to tell her the time is now to start getting serious about school. I'm waiting for her to listen...and waiting...and waiting.
I did have some hefty goals when I was growing up. Didn't we all? I wanted to be an oceanographer. But I waited too long to find out what I needed to do to make that happen. So, I didn't get to fulfill that dream. I just don't want my daughter to miss out on hers. She has way more talent than I ever did. How I wish she would just understand that.
Of course, my life has taken different twists and turns. And my goals have changed. These days, as I'm older and more exhausted now, I set small, daily goals. Today- laundry. Tomorrow- sweep the kitchen floor. Next week- clean the bathroom. This way it's easier to achieve my goals and if I don't complete them I'm not so devistated.
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